Throwback: Three Days In LA – An ESPY Awards Adventure

2013 ESPY Awards

I knew it was going to be an interesting trip to Los Angeles when I met actor Colin Farrell at LAX baggage claim upon arrival. Minutes later, I bumped my shoulder into Olympic legend Michael Phelps’ tightly toned torso while wildly retrieving my luggage from the baggage carousel.

Here is the actual transcript of our meeting:

“Whoa. Hi Michael, excuse me. That bag kinda got away from me there for a second.”

“No problem, how are you?”

“I am good, nice to see you.”

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40 Yard Dash: Laquon Treadwell & Josh Doctson Tell You It’s Overrated

40 Yard Dash: Why It Is Overrated

Since when did running a sub 4.4 40-yard dash guarantee NFL success? It never has and until game outcomes are decided by a straight-line footrace, it never will. The NFL became enamored with speed at the wide receiver position thanks to “Bullet” Bob Hayes.

But for every successful Hayes, an Olympic sprinter turned receiver, there are several draft busts whose perceived talents were overblown thanks to a single, largely meaningless metric. Players like Johnny “Lam” Jones. Troy Williamson. Darius Heyward-Bey.

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Let’s Reflect: “The Admiral” David Robinson’s 71 Point Game

What makes Robinson’s 71 point performance special is that not only was he just the third player to score 70+ in an NBA game, but that the 1993-94 NBA scoring title was on the line.

Dateline: 4/23/94. Back when your mom was young and hot and you were home alone because she was at the bar on a weeknight again.

Heading into the season’s final game, Robinson had to outscore Shaquille O’Neal by a total of four points and the title would be his. Both the Spurs and Magic had locked down their playoff seeding’s so it was essentially a meaningless game for both teams involved, as far as the standings were concerned.

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Top 5 Most NBA Playoff Points Per Game

Top 5 Most Points NBA Playoffs List Includes One Of These 2 Players - Allen Iverson Or Steph Curry?

Most NBA Playoff Points – Who’s The Man?

The NBA playoffs are referred to as the NBA’s “real season” because the quality of play and intensity improve. When the pressure was on, who stepped up for his team when it mattered the moist, I mean most? These dudes did with the highest PPG averages in NBA history. 

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Terry Crews Told Me About The Time He Got Knocked Out In An NFL Game And The Myths Of Manhood

Terry Crews Told Me About The Time He Got Knocked Out In An NFL Game And The Myths Of Manhood

Terry Crews knows a thing or two about being a MAN. The former professional football player turned actor turned Old Spice pitchman teamed up with the brand to launch the “Contempor-MANLY” campaign to celebrate 80 years of Old Spice.

Just as Jeffery Lebowski wondered allowed “What makes a man?” to The Dude in The Big Lebowski, I asked Terry several questions about successfully sailing the seas of manhood.

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Trevor Siemian Gave Skittles Dispensing Jacket To Lineman For Christmas – Video

Trevor Siemian Gave His O-Linemen A Skittles Dispensing Jacket

“A gift that keeps on giving…Skittles.” – Trevor Siemian

Broncos’ quarterback Trevor Siemian set the bar high this holiday season. Knowing the longstanding tradition of QB’s gifting their O-line with extravagant gifts, Trevor partnered with his favorite colorful candies and presented his offensive linemen with custom Skittles-dispensing parkas. Check out this video of the parka in action: 

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The Daytona 500 In 60 Seconds

The Daytona 500 is just absurd. One minute you’re drinking a mimosa at the NASCAR hospitality tent on a Sunday morning and suddenly you’re leaving to meet young stud driver of the #3 machine Austin Dillon and UFC champion Anthony “Rumble” Johnson. You have to cut that short to hop on a golf cart to ride to the front of Daytona International Speedway to meet Patriots’ TE Rob Gronkowski.

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Matt Ryan On Defining His Career And Getting The Weeknd Stuck In His Head

I asked Matt Ryan aka Matty Ice what it feels like to get chased around by a beast like Julius Peppers, his defining NFL moment, and if doing press at the Super Bowl without playing in the game (like he did last year) felt like going to prom without a date.

Who’s the best defender you’ve ever faced?

You have to go by positions – defensive line, linebackers, secondary and defensive backs. There’s so many good ones. I think of a guy early in my career that we went against a couple times every year in Carolina, Julius Peppers, around 2008. He was about as good as there is. Basically unblockable. In the secondary, early on in my career, seeing Ed Reed and the way he could go sideline to sideline, or Troy Polamalu. I remember I threw an interception against the Steelers my second or third year, and he just made an unbelievable play. Those three guys are three of the guys who jump in my head right off the bat.

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Top 10 Douchebags Of 2016 – Douchebag Of The Year Award

Top 10 Douchebags of 2016? What kind of list would this be without America’s Sweetheart Ryan Lochte?

Top 10 Douchebags Of 2016 – The List You Waited A Year For

It’s that time again when the year is coming to a close. We are all wrapped up in our gift giving, mounds of junk food, endless family gatherings, and holiday parties. Soon we will all be counting down from 10 to say “Happy New Year” with our friends, and family. We here at Sports Douchebags have an annual countdown tradition also.

This list of the Top 10 Douchebags of 2016 takes a look back on the year to celebrate all the Douchiness we’ve witnessed in the sports world. It’s easy to forget all the unwitting Douchiness we’ve all absorbed.

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Battle At Bristol In Twitter Embeds

paul-eide-mike-vick-busted-coverage
Mike Vick Had No Problem Sharing A Selfie With 2 White Guys From The Midwest

Reading is for the old. All the action is on social and there was a lot of that at Bristol.

I spent four days in an RV with six guys and here is what happened. </words.

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UEFA Europa League – What Is It?


What is the UEFA Europa League?

As a lifelong American, soccer has routinely occupied roughly the 8th tier of my personal Sports Interest Level. But as I’ve gotten older and had a child who eventually grew to love soccer, her interest got me into the youth version of the sport.

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Matt Forte Interview: Did Bears Give The Office Space Treatment?

This offseason, two-time Pro Bowl running back Matt Forte signed a three-year $12-million-dollar free agent contract with the New York Jets. Bears fans were, and still are, upset about it.

And why wouldn’t they be?

After eight years in Chicago, Forte ranks second, behind only Hall of Famer Walter Payton, on the Bears’ all-time lists for rushing yards, yards from scrimmage (12,718), receptions (487) and 100-yard games (24). He’s also third in total touchdowns and sixth in receiving yards (4,116).

This offseason, the Bears front office didn’t even attempt to re-sign the second most productive player in the history of the franchise.

Didn’t even attempt.

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Ludacris On Confidence – “It’s About Being In Touch With Your Higher Self”

paul-eide-ludacris

Ludacris is the personification of confidence. And at this point in his career, he’s earned every drop.

As a rapper, he’s sold over 24 million albums worldwide and won both Billboard Music Awards and Grammy Awards. As an actor, he’s won a Screen Actors Guild Award and a Critic’s Choice Movie Award.

With success comes confidence. But how do you develop confidence in the first place? And how do you avoid arrogance after experiencing success?

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How To Shave: Schick Hydro Barber Woody Donahue Drops Science In NYC

How To Shave Via Woody Donahue

I learned more about shaving from pro barber Woody Donahue in two hours than I had in 20+ years of begrudgingly dragging a razor across my face.

Donahue, the official Schick Hydro barber, set up shop at The Carlton Hotel in New York City and gave us the full treatment via hot towel shaves at a showcase event for the new Hydro5 and Edge Shave Gel.

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Product Review: The Drinking Jacket

Me and my The Drinking Jacket have survived many wars and always emerged looking fantastic.

Before I received the The Drinking Jacket for review, I couldn’t even spell the word “neoprene.” But now, after imbibing in its sweet, sensual delights and the life-altering trajectory I’ve been on since we met, I can’t sleep in a bed if the sheets aren’t neoprene with a thread count of 1,000.

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10 Things Strippers Hate

I talked to the Hot Babes of Show Palace, the Queens-based all-nude strip club that admits 18- to 21-year-old customers, and hires under-21 dancers, and …

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Rick Allen On How He Became NBC’s Voice And Face Of NASCAR

Rick Allen of NBC photobombing me and Jeff Burton.
Here’s that one time Rick Allen photobombed a perfectly good photo of me and Jeff Burton.

“The first event I ever announced was a women’s gymnastics meet at the University of Nebraska in Lincoln,” said Rick Allen, lead announcer for NASCAR on NBC. “The guy who was supposed to do it didn’t show up. And I just happened to be hanging around, so I did it.”

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On Location: Ball Up Streetball With The Professor And Eric Gordon

Streetball gets a bad wrap. After being exposed to the And1 Mixtape Tour, and occasional Rucker Park Tournament highlight, it’s easy to envision four guys standing around while one guy dribbles, each possession punctuated by a slam dunk with little or no defense.

But the Ball Up “Search for the Next” is completely different from its predecessors. It’s a 10-city tour looking for the best undiscovered player in the country that culminates in $100,000 and a roster spot for the tour’s winner.

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Ball Up Streetball Tour – The Professor SPEAKS

 

I Can’t Give The Professor Enough Props For Being Cool AF

“The Professor” aka Grayson Boucher is a streetball legend who converted a random tryout into a career as a professional basketball player.

While attending an And1 Mixtape Tour stop in Portland, Oregon in 2003, the 5’10” 155 pound 19-year-old Professor competed in an open run competition prior to that evening’s game and did well enough to get invited back that evening to square off against team And1.

After a solid performance in the game, he joined the team full-time and was suddenly getting paid to play basketball, literally overnight.

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Dale Earnhardt Jr. Wants You To Be A Man Again

Suave Men Will Keep You Groomed To Perfection, Like Paul Eide And Dale Earnhardt Jr.

If NASCAR legend Dale Earnhardt Jr. and his JR Motorsports teammate Regan Smith admit to doing it, then there’s no shame in admitting you have, too. So go ahead and unburden yourself – 80% of men have used their girlfriend, wife or spouse’s haircare products.

“We’re all guilty of getting lazy and grabbing whatever the girlfriend or wife is using,” admitted Earnhardt Jr., as he forced a room of roughly 40 men to confront a grim reality about themselves.

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Burning Nitro With NHRA Funny Car Driver Alexis DeJoria

Alexis DeJoria Kicked It With Your Boy Pauly E Prior To Engaging In Breakneck Speed
To some people, Alexis DeJoria is the wife of “Moster Garage” star Jesse James. To others, she is the daughter of Jean-Paul DeJoria (read my interview with him here, best life story evah), billionaire businessman and co-founder of Paul Mitchell hair products and the Patron Spirits Company. But on the NHRA Mello Yello circuit, Alexis DeJoria is one of the best Funny Car drivers on the tour.

I spent two days with Alexis and her team from Kalitta Motorsports at the Kansas Nationals at Heartland Park in Topeka, and inadvertently found ourselves in the middle of the most exciting weekend in the history of the sport.

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Talking Dove Men+Care products with stud Glenn O’Brien

Glenn O’Brien has done a ton of cool things. He was editor of Andy Warhol’s Interview magazine, and then the first Editor-at-Large in magazine history at High Times.

He produced and starred in Glenn O’Brien’s “TV Party,” which David Letterman called “the greatest TV show ever,” and he wrote and produced the film “Downtown 81,” starring Jean-Michel Basquiat. He has also worked as a stand-up comedian and an advertising creative director and copywriter.

But most importantly, Glenn O’Brien is a noted expert on YOU. He knows what looks good on you and, most importantly, what doesn’t.

I spoke to Glenn about when growing a beard doesn’t work, how to handle thinning hair with style, and the new 2015 Dove Men+Care Hair and Face range of products.

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Product Review: Dollar Shave Club

You down with DSC? Yeah, you know me! To be honest, in the beginning, Dollar Shave Club intimidated me.

“It can’t be that simple, can it? But I’m so used to getting completely reemed every time I need to buy a new cartridge of razors. How will I feel inside?” It was sort of like going to the DMV and they were suddenly serving ice cream or some shit, saying “Hi” to you, asking about your day…

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Product Review: SAXX Underwear

No one has ever summarized a man’s relationship with his underwear as accurately as Garth Algar in “Wayne’s World”:

The relationship between a dude and his underwear is a strange thing. In the past, I’ve had roommates and friends who thought it was funny to keep a pair of underwear so long, they (the undies) gradually begin to degrade over time, until certain areas that once provided support were completely gaped open, leaving nothing to the imagination.

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Arnette Eyewear’s Public Enemy Collection Sunglasses

What I didn’t realize while it was happening in the 1980s and 90s, and even up until this year, was how successfully Public Enemy branded themselves in an era when “branding” wasn’t a buzzword or something that everyone was trying to build, bereft of skill as they may be.

Even today, if you blast Public Enemy in your office at what is considered more than a reasonable volume, it will likely be received as a “statement” of some kind, just like when you hear a commercial for the latest U2 album and know there must be a new Apple product out.

The Public Enemy logo, a silhouette of a b-boy in the crosshairs of a gun sight, stood on its own merit independent of the group and became a defiant fashion statement against oppression (perceived or real), e.g. Edward Furlong as antagonist John Connor in “Terminator 2: Judgment Day,” who wears a PE shirt for the entirety of the movie.

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On location at the Oral-B USA 500 with COMBOS Curiosities

Certain things are obvious #GoodCombos, like the hacker and that iCloud he hacked to gift the world with nude pics of Jennifer Lawrence, Ariana Grande and Bar Rafaeli, aka “The Fappening.

A #BadCombo could potentially be 95 degree heat and endless asphalt. But COMBOS came up with a solution.

COMBOS Curiosities are here to test every combination available. They posses an admitted “bottomless appetite for combinations,” because “the world is a much better place with more COMBOS around.”

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Think You’re a Good Kisser? Survey Says Think Again

A new survey from yourtango.com has found that many people aren’t as good at kissing as they think.

The survey, led by YourTango, the #1 media company dedicated to love and relationships, found that the majority of people reportedly think they are pros at puckering up—however, only 53% of people believe that their partners are good kissers.

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Bud Light Whatever USA Changed My Life, Created New Life

When I received my invitation to Whatever, USA, the first thought that went through my mind was, “How many children will be conceived as a result of this Bud Light promotion?” And then, “Would there be some inherent shame in that?”

I can tell you with absolute certainty that if you’re reading this 20 years from now, Google searching your true lineage, there is NOTHING you have to be embarrassed about. Bud Light wanted to create the ultimate party weekend and they absolutely nailed it.

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Lindsay Lohan Boobs

More Hot Babes for you to look at: Top 10 Hottest NFL Cheerleaders Top 10 Hottest Cheerleaders Jesse Jane Tells Us About Banging Girls, The …

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On Location in NYC with Bud Light Mayor of Whatever!

The Mayor of Whatever poses for a photo op with his political constituents.

Last week, we were invited to the Aspen Social Club just off of Times Square in downtown New York City for a meet and greet, and grope, with Bud Light and the Mayor of Whatever, USA.

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Product Review: V2 Cigs Electronic Cigarettes

When I opened my Starter Kit from V2 Cigs, I wandered in wide-eyed and with no idea what to expect. While the e-cig market has recently exploded, the only prior experience I had with them was ribbing a buddy who totes his e-cig carrying case and essentials every time he leaves the house.

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Product Review: Vaseline Men Spray Lotion

The new Vaseline Men Spray Lotion came to me in a time of need. My skin was drier than the driest Norm McDonald joke. So dry, in fact, that had my friends known, my new name would’ve been “Ashley” rather than Paul because I was so ashy.

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Product Review: Schick Hydro 5 Sensitive Collection

The Schick Hydro 5 Sensitive Collection had all the sensitivity of a toddler petting a kitten on a pillow with a rainbow in the background, while listening to Richard Marx’s hit power ballad, “Hold Onto the Nights.”

As a dude, shaving your chin is a delicate, sensitive process. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve nicked myself in that particular area based solely on excessive speed and a lack of tenderness.

Luckily, the Schick Hydro 5 Sensitive is here to save us from ourselves. The Ultra Glide Blades are equipped with Skin Guards (that would be a sweet band name) that smooth the surface of the skin while you shave. In the 20-plus shaves I used the product, it didn’t happen once. And I sped through my shaves like a young Apollo Ohno.

Since we’re being sensitive, I have a confession to make. Thanks to investing in high priced, high-end shaving creams (not to be confused with the Tribe Called Quest classic, “The Low End Theory”) over the years, I’ve tended to look upon Edge products with a jaundiced eye.

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10 Best Lines to Pick Up Chicks On Vacation

The art of the pickup line is lost on certain babes, to be sure. But baby, if we get all sleazy with you, it’s only because we care.

Amazingly, sleaze turns into charm when it’s uttered in non-English.

With this in mind, your friends at One Hour Translation, a leading provider of human powered translation services around the world, have your back.

Think of One Hour Translation as a sex machine for words. They’ve actually taken the work out of it for you by assembling a list of the 10 best pick up lines to slay chicks on vacation, available in English, Spanish, Italian and French.

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Kobalt 40v Max Outdoor Power Equipment Introduced Me To Manhood!

“How do you work this Cutty Thing?”

When I was a kid, I used to think the old guys who took care of their yards were losers. While I was zooming around the neighborhood smoking bowls in my car listening to Bone Thugs-n-Harmony, I thought it was pathetic how homeowners genuinely took pride in their lawns. Surely there was more to life than a new mower, hedge trimmer or edger, I surmised.

But now that I’m in my 30s and have become one of those losers, I’m here to tell you that there isn’t more to life than that.

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Product Review: RumbaTime Bowery Watch Collection

It’s “time” to get a watch, playa. Rich people wear watches. If you’re trying to get your paper right, get a badass watch and show some fools “what time it is.”

A new survey from Spectrem Group’s Millionaire Corner shows most wealthy investors wear wristwatches (67 percent), with the percentage of wearers increasing with wealth. Which is why you should consider a new time piece from RumbaTime’s Bowery watch collection.

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DOVE MEN + CARE Deodorant and Antiperspirant Irritation-Free Monday Contest

Monday – time to spend eight hours with people you wouldn’t normally give eight seconds. Who would you kill for an Irritation-Free Monday?

Whoa, that answer came out of your mouth way too fast. Now that you made it all weird, let’s quickly switch gears to what DOVE Men + Care can do for you, within the confines of the law.

Instead of punching that guy in your office who says “TGIM” every Monday morning, get your revenge by entering the DOVE Irritation Free-Monday contest. The winner gets their choice from one of six #badass prizes (Sorry, murder for hire is not one of them, you freak.) below:

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